I Decided…

Just like Big Sean I made some decisions this year…

I mean we are 9 months into this year and I admit the decision I made today should’ve been made a while ago.

This morning, I informed my friends about some things im finally letting go of. I was apprehensive to say what I had been feeling, simply because I know the moment you make a decision the whole world will test you to see if you “bouty bouty” (lol I had to)

Nevertheless… I told them so they can hold me accountable.

See.. I’m certain that God has been whispering this to me for a while now… and instead of listening, I’ve been putting it off… deliberately **begins to peek up at the sky**

This morning I thought about the signs God has been showing me over the past few weeks… he’s showed me some of the way’s he’s going to use me at my church, he’s been slowly showing me how he’s going to use me to reach other women.

BUTĀ 

IT’S

THIS

ONEĀ 

THINGĀ 

THATĀ 

HADĀ 

MEĀ 

TRIPPING!

Seriously… I’d been stuck with this one thing… I couldn’t get past… quite frankly i’m not sure I wanted to.. see it was easier for me to hold on to it because it meant I didn’t have to deal with the reasons I felt the way I did…

come on now… the hardest person for us to face is ourselves, right?

See my problem came in years ago when I somehow believed that I was unworthy… when I believed I wasn’t qualified…. I wasn’t good enough…

Isn’t that funny?

My Pastor (Edward Kirkpatrick) calls that stinkin’ thinkin’ and he’s right. lol

But back to what I let go.

I was sooooo concerned with this one thing… this one thing i couldn’t shake… more concerned than i could ever express here.

Today. I decided it was no longer any of my concern.

As a matter of fact, it wasn’t EVER really my concern. I took it on… I kept it… I allowed it to fester… I fed it with my stinkin’ thinkin’… Ā I always expected it…

Today… I let it go.

See in Pastor Furtick’s sermon last week he said “stop mourning and move on”

in a sense maybe I was mourning… mourning the feelings I felt… Ā or more like harbored…

My friend told me to pray..Ā and I know that’s the only thing that’ll keep me focused.

I have things to do… people to reach.. a calling to fulfill and I can’t do that bound by the emotion of hate.

so today… I let it go.

Let the SHIFT begin!

 

 

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